Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Facebook faux pas

I started this post and it got really (really!!) long so I am going to break it down and just focus on one faux pas for now!

When I was in my darkest days waiting (and waiting, and waiting) in the uncertainty and sadness of our infertility I started unsubscribing from certain facebook "friends." I didn't unfriend them for 2 reasons:

1. I was afraid they would notice and confront me (this goes for friends that I still see IRL)
2. I am nosey and like the ability to look at pictures on my own terms

The people that I unsubscribed from had certain commonalities, such as:

1. They were pregnant or already had children
2. They posted things about how much they loved being part of the "mommy club" (*barf* I will NEVER say that!) or how being a mom is the hardest, or most rewarding job they have ever had, or how their life had no meaning before having babies (ummmm...maybe you need to GET A LIFE then, people! Having kids changes things, for sure, but I HAD A LIFE before and many parts of it were darn amazing!)
3. They posted things about being "proud" of being pregnant
4. They complained about their children in non-funny ways
5. They used certain adjectives to describe their own children 

Now that I am a mom, I thought I would be less sensitive. While I no longer cry, I still get very annoyed by certain types of talk. Here is the first on my list of facebook faux pas. 

1. Saying "awwww" about your own kids/what your own kids did. "Awwww" is an acceptable response to what other people's kids have done (always acceptable for pets, as well). If you "awww" about your own kids, plan on making me throw up in my mouth a little bit.

Do any of you have certain types of talk that annoy you on facebook? I hope that I don't annoy people when I post about my family or daughter, but I do wonder sometimes if I am committing a facebook faux pas in the opinion of some of my friends!

12 comments:

  1. There are 2 things that drive me insane.
    1. I am friends with a girl and her mom comments on every picture of this girls kids, awe so cute. love them, hugs and kisses etc etc. Really, on every picture???

    2. Same girl from above whose description of said photos is <3 them them, love them etc. You love your kids, I never would have guessed that!

    I do have a couple more but those 2 are the most annoying by far.

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  2. Ha!! I love that 'awwwww' does that to you. :) I can't decide if that bugs me or not. I'm leaning towards not. I will have to think about what my biggest FB faux pas are and get back with you!!

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    1. I guess it is only coming from certain people (which is maybe unfair, obviously I must have a bias). Here is an example..."Hung up our brand new porch swing tonight- I can't wait to relax on it while holding/rocking my new little Baby this fall while I watch the girls play in the yard....awww!" So I guess maybe that is not really ABOUT her kids...does the "awww" annoy me when it is about oneself? I'll have to think about it more, too, I guess!

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  3. Ha, that sort of thing bugs me to! Along with parents gushing about how cute their own children are - a comment here or there is fine, but it's easy to cross the line into overkill. Looking forward to hearing about more items on your list :)

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  4. I can't handle people who say "Don't get me wrong, I love my kids BUT......." and then they proceed to complain about them. As if prefacing it with "I love my kids" makes it any less annoying for me to read?! It's like their free pass to say anything they want about their kids in a negative way. Blech! :)

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  5. I think I'm with all of the comments on the annoying stuff! I'll try my best to comment "Awwwww" on all F's photos :) I can't wait to hear your other faux pas. One of mine, not having to do with kids, is all the sharing of 'daily photos' or 'daily inspirations' etc. from generic websites, or sharing the "I'm a proud aunt, re-post if you love your niece and nephews" photos...drives me insane!!

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    Replies
    1. Those drive me insane. Or like/comment if you believe this. Kind of reminds me of the chain letters that used to go around.

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    2. I also DESPISE those kinds of posts!

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  6. Agreed on all counts! This is a very specific pet peeve, but I don't like when friends of mine complain excessively about their kids/spouses/etc. in private and then paint a rosy picture like their lives are perfect on facebook, ie: reading, "My husband is the greatest husband and father in the universe! I hope my precious son is just like him when he grows up!" shortly after a friend complained about how frustrated she was with her husband and his parenting.

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  7. I agree...on all accounts! I have a relative who is currently expecting and counts down to EVERY milestone on FB. i.e. "In 3 weeks, we get to find out the sex...I hope we get a girl, so ____ can have a sister!", "I am so excited to get our first ultrasound picture in 13 days." Annoying! :)

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  8. Here's my top 3 (I could probably go on and on, but I'll limit myself):

    1) Mom's who "complain" about x, y, or z that happened or that their kid said or did, and then end the (lengthy) post with the phrase "Oh, the joys of motherhood!"

    2) Play-by-play postings of potty training updates. I'm not against the occasional, preferably humorous, post or story. But I don't need a daily count of how many #1s and #2s, and I definitely do NOT need pictures!

    3) Posts from "supermoms" in which they brag about how domestic, creative, and amazing they are (i.e. "made 25 batches of organic baby food grown and harvested in my own backyard whilst sewing my own cloth diapers and concocting toxin-free, environmentally friendly solutions for everything from scraped knees to toilet cleaner". I have no problem if you do any of the above - but it's the ones who post about it in such a way as to pass judgment on the rest of us lowly humans who are just happy when we make it to the end of the day with everyone alive and more or less healthy :)

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  9. People and their babies never really annoyed me on facebook, unless they were the kind of parents that complained about EVERYTHING! It was announcements of pregnancy and people who updated about every little thing that happened while they were pregnant. While pregnant I tried not to share anything or complain about anything because I new there were people who wanted to be where I was. As a mom, I share the cute things that Matthew does, but never complain about lack of sleep, etc. because it is everything I wanted and more even if it is frustrating at times. I think those of us who struggle with getting pregnant are more able to enjoy the times of frustration that parenting brings and realize how much of a gift it truly is, than those who do not have to work as hard for that bundle of joy.

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