Freaky Friday

Well, not really. More of an "I want to freak out" Friday. The kids were kooky but I can't blame them...I was ready to be on break before I even put on my casual Friday clothes this morning! The part that kind of made me want to fall apart was a conversation with the last pregnant lady on staff (the other 2 are home with their beautiful bundles). As she dropped off her kids she commented on a baby book that I had another class make for their teacher who had their baby about a week ago. The students wrote blessings for the new family and did phenomenal illustrations of mother and baby animals. Things like, "May you protect your baby like a mother lion protects her cub," and then they did a drawing of a mother lion and cub. I gave it to another teacher to bind (I don't know how to use that binder thingy) and she brought it to the office to share with the rest of the teachers and staff before she delivers it to the new momma. Enough intro to the convo...

It was pretty much just this teacher gushing about how the book was so wonderful and it made her want to cry because it was SO SWEET and she'd keep it out ALL THE TIME, blah, blah, blah. All the while rubbing her baby bump and talking about babies and pregnancy and hormones that make you so emotional about mother stuff. I was just like, "Yes, didn't they do a great job on the book? They were so creative." I was trying to end the conversation because 1. It was unpleasant for me. and 2. I had her class waiting in my room to start their project! Part of the beauty of handing that book off to another teacher to finish was that then I didn't have to think about it anymore. I know she didn't do it on purpose, but the conversation did not help me power through the next 80 minutes of teaching! And little does she know that I have a book in the works for her and the other teacher who had her baby earlier this month. I did not need all that, "I'm pregnant, too! I want a book! I want to feel special and recognized for my ability to reproduce!" hint dropping. It's in the works, lady. Just be patient. The kids already made their images and wrote their words. I just need to put the books together. That is one of the things on my spring break "To Do" list.

Looking on the bright side, I am officially on spring break in 2 hours! (tsk, tsk to me for blogging on my prep!).

One. More. Day.

And then I am on spring break! I probably shouldn't be this excited about spring break at age 28, but I am! I get more excited about it as a teacher than I ever did as a kid, actually! I know the circles under my eyes will benefit from some extra rest and my tight chest will benefit from some de-stressing. I am SO READY for a BREAK!

Thankfully, today was really fun at school. The kids are amped but channeled their energy for (mostly) good. Two kindergartners brought me a huge poster they made for me (I didn't even have them today but they made it for me during their choice time! Awe!) by taping together several sheets of paper. It was such a nice end to the day!

Also, yesterday one of my co-workers got a tattoo that I helped design for her and I got to see it today! I drew it on her skin about 2 weeks ago with Sharpie and she snapped a picture to bring to the tattoo shop. I was tickled to hear that the tattoo artist wondered who drew it on her. When she said, "Our Art teacher!" he was like, "WHAT art teacher?! This is fantastic!" Well, at least that is what my co-worker said he said:) And the tattoo was EXACTLY like the one I drew, too! Size, color, placement, everything! It reminded me that I AM AN ARTIST and I do nice work. That part of me gets pushed down and ignored far too often. Hopefully I'll make some time for my own work over my break!


I hope all of you have a lovely Friday tomorrow!

A Prayer

Telling my Mom about our struggle with fertility has been one of the most liberating things for me in the last 20 months. I told her last October and she has been nothing but supportive (even though she says some funny things at times!). A few weeks ago she gave me a bag of stuff that included some sewing supplies, books about teaching, two tape dispensers (I have an abnormal love of office/school supplies), and some cardboard tubes and cereal boxes (that I use for projects at school, art teachers truly are scroungers!). I am embarrassed to admit that it took me this long to completely unpack the last of the goodies.

 Here is what I found at the very bottom of the bag:

Sorry for the terrible picture (I did not use our new camera to snap this photo!). It is a prayer card with St. Gerard Majella on the front and this prayer on the back:

Almighty God, Author of Life,

your servant,

St. Gerard Majella,

practiced love of you

and love of others

in an extraordinary way.

Through his powerful intercession,

grant the gift of life to couples

who need your help.

Protect the unborn and 

assist mothers-to-be.

May children,

especially those in the womb

and the most vulnerable,

be a sign of your unfailing love.

It was just what I needed today! I have been searching for a prayer for people dealing with infertility or a patron saint of infertile couples and found nothing! Then, without even mentioning it to her, my Mom found this and gave it to me! I will be saying this with my nightly prayers for all of us going through this difficult experience!

Photos!

Last weekend we went up north for one last winter hurrah with some of our very good friends. It was a refreshing break from our day to day lives even though Mother Nature prevented snowshoeing, ice skating, skiing and snowboarding because it was around 65 degrees out! We did get to enjoy some pond skipping (skiers and snowboarders speed down a hill and try to cross a pond over the top of open water!). It was entertaining and it gave me a chance to try out our new toy:

 

A Canon Rebel T3i !!!

I saved a portion of last year's summer program income with the intention of buying this beauty and we FINALLY got around to it! The Bee is busy reading the manual and I have been playing with it but still have A LOT to learn! Hopefully, someday this blog will have lovely pictures to spice it up a little:) Until then, here's an okay image of the pond skipping (only my 12th or so photo...things should only improve!):

Other than that, not much going on here!

10 years

My 10 year class reunion is coming up this summer. For some reason my high school class held a five year reunion (who does that? weird.) that The Bee and I attended because some of our friends were involved in the planning. It was held a few months (i.e. 9 months) late so it was probably closer to a 6 year reunion, really. What a waste of an evening, in my opinion.

Again, some of our friends (and I am talking about real friends that we still see pretty regularly and enjoy spending time with, not just facebook friends or something) are involved in the planning of the upcoming reunion. One of them is actually the friend who is responsible for practically every good thing in my life. She was in our wedding and everything. And the reunion is being held ON OUR FIFTH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!  Hahahahaha! So, thankfully, that gives us an easy excuse as to why we won't be attending. We didn't want to go anyway. Here are our other reasons:

1. We still see all of the people that matter to us pretty regularly. Many of us still live within a couple of hours of one another. Those who have moved further away visit from time to time and The Bee and I have traveled for a few of their weddings. If we don't see them often, we keep in touch via e-mail, telephone, text, snail mail, facebook...

2. Facebook has kept us in the loop with many people that we don't have 'real life' relationships with. I don't feel the need to spend my hard earned cash to go hang out with them and hear them regurgitate their facebook statuses and posts.

3. The 5 year reunion was painful to attend. It seriously felt like high school all over again (not the fun parts) for shy folks like me. I pretty much only talked to the people I mentioned in #1 of this list (the people that truly matter to us who we regularly make an effort to see in real life).

4. At the 5 year, not much had changed for a lot of people. The Bee and I were married at that point and I was wrapping up my Master's degree at the time. Since then, I have worked as a teacher using my Master's that I wrapped up 4/5 years ago and I am still happily married to The Bee. I don't need to go hang out with people to talk about that.

5. You didn't think I'd forget infertility, did you? Had things gone as planned, we would have a bouncing bundle of joy already. Instead we are pretty much where we were at the last reunion! It may be weak of me, but I don't want to talk about how we've been together for 11 years and married for 5 years (TO THE DAY!) and haven't started a family yet. I know people would make a big deal of it completely unaware of the pain they would be causing us.

So there you have it. Sorry, Class of 2002, I'll be celebrating five years of marital bliss with The Bee. See you in another 10 years:)

Bring on the Spring!

Well, AF officially arrived last night. I, in my silliness, actually took a pregnancy test first thing yesterday morning (only the 5th one I've taken since starting ttc 20 months ago). I was wondering if *maybe* I could actually be pregnant and didn't want to go on my first run of 2012 if I was. I didn't think I was based on my previous cramping, lovely skin, and mood (hence the half of a rum and Coke I indulged in with Friday night dinner) but the heart is a funny thing and hopes even in hopeless times. It was a very clear BFN, obviously.

Yesterday was an amazing, spring-like day! Sixty-three and sunny with a lovely breeze! Very strange for March 10 in the cold north! The temperature actually broke the record for the historical high (it was 58 on March 10 like 60 years ago). I am so glad I went running. I was reminded about how amazing some exercise and fresh air can make a person feel! It did lift my spirits (thank God for endorphins!) although I still cried at least 3 times over the course of the day. I have 3 more cycles before The Bee and I get to move on to the next chapter of our story...I am both terrified and excited about my laparoscopy in June.

So, since AF is here, that means I get to go shopping for my new boots! I am thinking of getting some Minnetonka Moccasins. What do you think of them?

 

source

Have a happy weekend!

I had QUITE a day at work...fun, fun cramps (thanks, body, for not getting pregnant. AGAIN.), lice epidemic (thankfully none of the little darlings that I taught today), a handful of middle schoolers thinking they'd get away with playing hooky (they were hunted down by 9:30am), and finding out that one of the 3 preggo teachers will be induced tomorrow (her long term sub isn't available until next Thursday!!).

All I can say is TGIF. Now waiting on The Bee so we can have our Mexican food feast (he's picking up rum on the way home...he convinced me to only give up coffee and wine for Lent...ha!).

If you are in need of a laugh...check out this tumblr. It will crack. you. up.

Have a happy weekend!