Thank you, everyone:)

Thank you all for your advice and input. This was yet another example of me overreacting about something that most mature adults wouldn't bat and eye at. It seems that infertility has made me even more anxious than I used to be about everything in the world.

After playing phone tag, my nice sister-in-law called and we actually connected. Sounds like she and my third sister-in-law already have the date set and it is in mid-May (so being a bloated, post-surgery me wouldn't be a problem). She was very kind (truly, don't know why I was afraid to talk to her) and let me know the date, asked if I'd want to help (she prefaced it with "as much or as little as you'd like and we don't want you to feel obligated"), and then asked if I thought I was open that day. I am a horrendous liar and also hate to make people upset so I thanked her for offering to include me but said that I didn't think I could help given everything we are dealing with right now. I also said I would talk to The Bee to see if there were any plans that day but that a friend of ours was trying to re-schedule her twins' birthday party from the second weekend in May due to an outbreak of chicken pox (which is 100% true). She didn't push and just replied, "I can understand that. How have you been?" See? She is so nice!

So...at this point I am not helping with it but haven't actually said no to attending (wishy-washy much?). The Bee said we could schedule something else and if I felt bad about not going, he would drive me to the shower to drop off the gift and say "hi" and then we could be on our way to whatever we scheduled (i.e. hopefully the re-scheduled b-day party so I don't have to fib/feel like a mean person who can't handle happy things).

Thank you again for your comments. You all calmed me down today and Infertile625, you made me laugh with your "crazy pants sister-in-law" comment:)